“Goodness gracious its great to be white in South Africa” – besides being able to use the term “goodness gracious” we are blessed with the Woolworths organic section, Desperate Houswives, Kenilworth “Upper” and Jacques Kallis in Sanex ads. We can go forth with gay abandon, get our hair highlighted, our skin bronzed and pull off khaki in the winter months. And while all these attributes might seem “skin deep” lets also not forget that we own 73% of all private arable land, 72% of the JSE and 100% of Steenberg Golf Estate; although I did see a sneaky Turkish family trying to settle into a 3-bedroom adjacent to the 4th tee. So, while lying on my beach lounger in my upmarket Sea Point complex, I was quite perturbed by a Tweet I received condemning my lack of condemnation of “white genocide” in a previous article. Its a strong word that, “genocide”. One thinks of Rwandan child soldiers with hyenas on chain leashes tearing through an impoverished village, a concept quite removed from my current situation. “Wheres that SPF-50?” I say in an angered tone, if I’m going to tackle genocide I damn sure dont want to be burnt.
According to that ‘ol bastion of truth, the SA Crime Stats, 15 940 people were murdered in our country last year. Just edging out those pesky neighbours of the north, Sudan, to claim a glorious third place, behind Nigeria and Ethiopia for the African championship. If we accept that this rate has dropped in recent years, and we take an estimated average of 15 000 murders since 1994, then a broad figure of about 270 000 people’s lives were cut short since the advent of democracy. Is this the point where someone shouts an “amandla” or a “viva”? Now according to the SA Institute of Race Relations, about 68 000 whites have come to a gruesome end during the same period. Considering the wealth and ability to purchase microwaveable duck from Woolies, then basic human nature suggests that they will be a target from crime (please note the obvious “white denial” conveniently forgetting decades of racial oppression, that could potentially irk a few black folk. Sarcasm intended.). Genocide implies a near total destruction of a people based on ethnicity, and with 5.5 million pale faces roaming the streets, 1.2% of the population does not a genocide make.
Im not denying that there isnt a rampant reign of violence engulfing our Rainbow Nation, but whiteys arent being targeted because theyre white, but because they are the ones wearing Gucci underwear and coyly flashing around their gold watches at the Boxing Day test match. Very few “white” murders are based on passion, but rather opportunity during robberies or other crimes. Next time a white man is fearful for his own safety in even a predominantly middle class white area, think about the black dude in Khayelitsha whose shack is kept together by a flimsy lock, and the distant sound of gunfire permeates the night sky. Your lilly-white private school ass knows sweet jack shit; pack your genocide and hamba, you over privileged paranoid son of a bitch.
But there is the other end of the coin; farm murders. The land issue is a clinical knife point in the country, and with Juju and his still dedicated legions of followers, gripped by the idea of “all whites are criminals” and “the land is rightfully ours” there has been a disproportionate wave of violence targeting white farmers. This is emotional. The graphic reminiscences of the affected, detailing the torture and macabre acts of hatred on seemingly innocent families is grave cause for concern. These are true hate crimes that do deserve attention. But 4041 murders is not more of a National Crisis than gang warfare, or your run of the mill ANC Limpopo Conference. Cause for concern? Yes. Something must be done? Absolutely. Main point of concern for national security? Fuck right off, Winston, this isnt ’84.
So to @Buitendagjaco, why am I not writing about white genocide? There you go, there isnt any. Try being slightly more patriotic and asking why we arent doing more about South Africans being murdered, because your little enclave isnt particularly unique. There arent crime stats based on privilege; but if you were to ask I would bet that murder is rife among the wealthy because of the instability of our social spectrum. Us whiteys, with our chilled savignon blanc, Marie Claires and “canapés” need to simply beef up the ADT subscription and be damn grateful we arent dodging bullets on the way to Phillipi Secondary School.
*Follow @Stroobz on Twitter as he wears khaki skinnny jeans, and attempts to teach an AWB member how to crochet.