Open door policy

Over the weekend I was chatting to one of my girl friends (eish that sounded a touch gay) and somehow the issue of toilets came up. She’s just moved into a new place and relayed a story of how she has yet to get a door for her bathroom at home. She then continued to tell me about how she would just “go for it” at home, EVEN when her boyfriend was there- giving a little wave if he happened to stroll past her while she was in the process of pulling her poo face.

I was utterly mortified… firstly because she lives in bachelor flat (as all of us young up and comings know, your lounge is your kitchen and bedroom) and then secondly because I feel like there should still be some form of mystery- no matter how comfortable you are with each other. I don’t even fart infront of mooiness- unless its one of those sneaky, under the covers wofters. I would even go as far as saying you should have 2 bathrooms if possible- in my mind my mooiness smells only of apples and success. So what I’m wondering is- am I just old school in believing that once you’ve let rip with a meaty one in the presence of your significant other the romance is officially dead?

I understand that at times you might let the odd one slip out while bending over to pick up the keys you’ve just dropped- and that’s ok, but really the only thing I ever want to see coming out of a mooiness are her sexy juices.

Keep the mystery… have some mystique

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Im a guy with a very particular view of life... im not quite sure what that view is just yet, but when I find out I'll be sure to let you know...


  1. I had to laugh… I think if you got to go you got to go! LOL! but not having a door on your bathroom is a bit crap! When you break up you forever have to live with the fact that your x saw you on the crapper!

  2. C’mon guys… seriously!!!!

    My fiance and i love to provoke each other with really good farts and then seeing each other squirm with utter disgust!! He is my BEST friend in the whole world and we totally accept one anothers flaws and really weird quirks!

    It is so nice to be so completely comfortable that you can be yourself, no judgments and still be loved for WHO you are 🙂

    As for the romantic side, we have many ways to keep that fire burning and it even involves the bathroom 😉

  3. LOL…. i think you actually know my Fiance, a nawty guy called Carlisle 😉

    But yeah, to be honest if you guys cant laugh with or at each other, then what the hell are you doing together? We even trip each other in the Supermarket just to see each other fall flat on our faces and knock a few things off the shelves in the process hehe. One time i had a milk sachet in my hands, he tripped me, but i took him with me and SPLAT… milk all over the SPAR HAHA!!

    As for the bathroom activities, i’ll leave it to your imagination 😉 I think another secret is to keep “others” guessing!!! As if we have a dirty little secret and it’s all ours!!!

    1. Dirty little secret being the word in this post 😉 LOL!

      You 2 sound like a bunch of nutters when people aren’t round. tripping and shit! HAHAHA!

  4. I’ve been married 9 years next month, and my husband has seen me pee twice. In fact, he didn’t really see me, because I made him turn around in the shower and block his ears. It’s not because I’m shy – I just think it’s a respect thing. We are still constantly learning about each other, and that’s just not one of the things I want to know(or vice versa).

  5. Well just from the 2 different comments above, it shows how different we are in relationships. So Ricky, these 2 should answer your question of the post. Its cool that we all so different.

    WOW that was a Jerry Springer Final Thought Moment!

    Take care of yourselves and each other… Good Night.

    1. haha i’m glad rory 🙂

      As for the rest of you… well yes- guess we all have different vibes when it comes to bodily functions hey! haha!

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