Clean the house- make it through the night alive

I’m going to try and clean the house today after work… These would be my famous last words before I was murdered by my mooiness. With things going swimmingly at the start of the year, every day becomes more and more of juggling act, trying to balance the needs of work and my personal life in a way where I can actually stay out later than 10pm on a weeknight and still be up for promotion at the end of the month.

With a schedule as demanding as that, it is needless to say things like cleaning the apartment that I’ve just moved into have taken a backseat in my life (like all the way back. Like at the back of the bus- back). If you were to ask my mates what they thought about my general standards of cleanliness, they’d probably vote me in as “the person most likely to die from an accidental hair gel fire”. Apparently though, the same anal retentivity doesn’t doesn’t carry over to my domestic life. From the time when I was a little whipper-snapper, I never really enjoyed doing housework, only discovering what on earth that brush in the bathroom was actually used for at the not so tender age of 13, when I almost used it to scrub my dirty rugby socks, much to my mother’s dismay (just in case you don’t know- it’s used to clean poo bits off the inside of the toilet).

Maybe it’s a guy thing. Just try and explain to a 20-something bunch of guys why it is important to clean the ring around the bath and you’ll probably be met with a series of very blank expressions akin to those displayed by Julius Malema in his Matric Woodwork exam… I mean kids are starving out there- who cares about what type of geometric pattern has appeared in the bath anyways?! Well you should care, because it’s almost guaranteed that the person who you are/will eventually be living with will.

Apart from the siffness factor, it’s important to do a bit of a clean as often as you can muster up the energy because this is going to show that you respect other people who share your space (as a partner or guest) enough to keep things clean. This unfortunately means investing in cleaning products and applying a little bit of elbow grease on a weekly basis (who’s got the money to buy beer and get a maid in every week as well?). Make an effort to keep things clean and you’ll more than likely be praised for being sensitive and “not like the other guys” as a wonderful by-product of this activity. At least this is what I think happens (I haven’t tried it yet). So tonight… after work, I’m going to try and clean the house. I’ll let you all know how that goes.

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Im a guy with a very particular view of life... im not quite sure what that view is just yet, but when I find out I'll be sure to let you know...